What does the fear of the Lord produce in my life? According to Proverbs fear of the Lord…

• Gives me Knowledge 1:7
• Gives me Knowledge of God 2:5
• Gives me a distaste for evil 8:13
• Gives me Wisdom 9:10, 15:33
• Adds length to my life 10:27
• Aids in living a righteous lifestyle 14:2
• Helps me Avoid evil 14:16, 16:6
• It is a fountain of life 14:27; 19:23
• Produces an atmosphere of security in my home 14:26
• Brings wealth and honor 22:4
• Keeps me from being envioius 23:17
• Brings blessing 28:14

Not a bad list of benefits!  Move forward with fear.

First Wednesday July 2010 – Mac Lake from Seacoast Church on Vimeo.

So once you make it through day one what do you do with the rest of your week?  Here are a few things to think through.

Gain an Understanding of the Corporate Culture – Corporate culture is “the way we do things around here.”  If you don’t understand the culture of your new organization you could find yourself fighting against it rather than working with it.  Refrain from saying, “The way we did it at (your former place of employment).” Instead work hard to ask questions, listen and seek to understand the vision and values of your new place of employment.  This week I’ve scheduled four one on one appointments with long standing staff members in order to help me understand the DNA of West Ridge Church.  Next week I have several appointments with younger staff members in order to connect with them and gain an understanding of how they view the organization.  Week one is just the beginning of learning the culture, it will take a long time but if you approach it with intentionality you can raise your learning curve significantly. 

Make Priority based Decisions - Being new you will have a lot coming at you, people wanting to meet with you,  new opportuntities, tasks that are “urgent” and expectations from a wide variety of people.  The temptation will be to please everyone.   However, one of the downfalls of many new employees is to over promise and under deliever, which hurts your crediblity with the team.  So keep your top 3-5 priorities in front of you where you look at them every day and make decisions based on these priorities not the pressure you feel to please others.     

Identify Key Partners – To make things happen quickly it will be important that you identify who you will be working with.  This may be volunteers,  team members, or staff from other departments.  Regardless of who it is you will need to build a team of people that work together to accomplish the vision.  Spend time early on meeting with these individuals getting to know them and allowing them to get to know you.  Don’t be so anxious to “get it done” that you miss the relational connections.  While you are committed to building a specific program or vision, the most important thing you can build when you’re first starting is TRUST.  Take the time to get to know people, their gifts, strengths and passions then you will be able to place them and utilize them in their gifted areas where they will flourish the most. 

Connect, connect, connect – Spend time with people.  I’ve heard it said, “People are your greatest asset”.  But that’s not really a complete statement.  The truth is, people’s strengths, wisdom, experience, passion, gifts and influence are your greatest asset.  The only way to discover these are to spend time getting to know the people you work with.  Don’t forget that it’s not just getting to know their story or their strengths, it’s getting to know their soul.  Discover the fresh things that God is doing in their life and how it connects with God’s purpose for bringing you into your new position.  Connect, connect, connect.

What else would you focus on in your first week in a new position?

1. Remain Silent
2. Complain to others
3. Talk to them about it.

Okay, let’s break down each of these options to determine which approach we should take.

OPTION #1  REMAIN SILENT - While this may seem honorable to some, it’s extremely dangerous.  Those who take this approach actually undermine authentic community and can develop a spirit of self-righteous pride.  If a leader has offended or hurt you, not dealing with it allows resentment to build in your heart.  And if the leaders actions were truly wrong then not addressing it allows that potential blind spot to persist in their leadership character. Remaining silent hurts you and the leader in the long run.  Solomon declares in Proverbs 10:18 “He who conceals hatred is a liar.”    Be careful, your silence may not be as honorable as you think.

OPTION #2 COMPLAIN TO OTHERS – Many people feel justified using this approach because they were truly wronged.  However, complaining to others spreads discontent and division among the team.  Even the most subtle complaints to co-workers undermines the authority of the leader and weakens the unity the organization.  Someone one told me, “If you speak poorly of an individual, what would make tha person you are talking to think you would not speak poorly of them as well.”  When we speak negatively about others it diminishes peoples confidence in our character.  Solomon gives warning in Proverbs 16:27-28 “A scoundrel plots evil, and his speech is like a scorching fire. 28 A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.”

OPTION #3 TALK TO THEM- The reason most people fail to confront is they view confrontation as a means of recompense rather than reconciliation.  Viewing the confrontation from a selfish perspective (What am I going to get out of it) will only build walls and create a defensive spirit in most leaders.  But a Christ Centered perspective of seeking reconciliation and restoration is more likely to produce an open spirit within the person being confronted.  When they sense a humble spirit with a selfless motive walls of defense will melt and it’s more likely to produce a healthy, productive discussion.  Solomon reminds us in Proverbs 27:6 “faithful are the wounds of a friend.”

Hurt? Offended?  What’s your next step?

• He tried to walk on water and sank
• Jesus asked him to pray for a few hours and he fell asleep
• He rebuked Jesus for talking about dying and Jesus told him, “Get behind me Satan”
• He wasn’t going to let Jesus wash his feet and Jesus said, “Whoa you don’t understand!”
• He impulsively chopped the ear off of the soldier who was arresting Jesus
• Or perhaps his biggest failure, he denied knowing Jesus not just once but three times

 There’s more written about Peter than any other disciple and it’s amusing that Scripture is not shy about recording his failures. But Peter didn’t let his failures stop him, he evidently knew how to fail successfully.
 
Don’t let your failures stop you.  Sometimes the difference between living a great life for God and living in mediocrity is how we handle our failures.

Many leaders run dangerously close to empty in their emotional and spiritual lives and risk embarrassment of foolish decisions or costly mistakes.   In yesterdays post I shared three of the six major energy drainers for leaders:  Unresolved Conflict, Indecisiveness and financial instability.

Here are the final three.

• Family disharmony -  Feelings of guilt from not giving your family the time they deserve can serve as a subtle energy drainer.  Each time you make an excuse, miss a ballgame or come home later than promised you get another knot of guilt in your gut.  Leaders can become very skilled at ignoring this important area telling themselves they are doing “important” work.  So get ahead of your busyness and schedule at least one day off a week and regular vacations.  Then practice saying “no” to some things other than your family.  1 Timothy 3:4-5
• Excessive Output- Some leaders are running on empty simply because they give, give and give.  They spend their week teaching, leading meetings, coaching and serving.  There’s a lot going out but nothing coming in.  It doesn’t take long to drain your reserves when you are in constant output mode.   Be careful because a shallow heart will lead to a shallow ministry.  Just as you eat regularly scheduled meals throughout the day, you need to have regularly scheduled mental and spiritual times of intake as well.  John 15:4-5
• Poor Physical Health – For some odd reason pastors seem to be really good at nurturing their spiritual health but totally neglect their physical health.  Poor physical health leads to low emotional energy and loss of focus.  If you’re showing signs of fatigue beware that you’re more susceptible to mediocrity as well as temptation.   1 Corinthians 6:19-20

What are other energy drainers you’ve observed?

1. Unresolved conflict - being upset with someone or knowing someone is upset with you can occupy your mind with hours of wasted worry.   Avoiding the reconciliation process keeps your subconscious distracted and leaking emotional energy until the relational conflict is resolved.  Determine to address the conflict TODAY.  The longer you wait the more internal energy you’re leaking and the less effective you’ll be in the other areas of your leadership. While it may not end as you would like, bringing the matter to conclusion will allow your mind to go back to a normal restful state.  Matthew 18:15
2. Indecision - lingering decisions can weigh on the mind of leaders day and night.  Decisions take time but if you find yourself in a prolonged period of indecision you’ll drive yourself crazy and drain your energy banks at the same time.  Wrestling with multiple options and outcomes can generate enormous anxiety, especially  if the leader feels the burden of make a decision alone.  So get 85% of the facts, get good counsel, pray diligently and pull the trigger.  In that moment of decision it’s likely you’ll feel a flood of energy flow back into your soul.  James 1:5
3. Financial instability- Personal or organizational financial troubles can serve as one of the biggest stress factors in a leaders life.  Too many leaders find themselves paralyzed rather than proactive in these times.  Instead of taking immediate action the temptation is to wait for the last minute miracle.  Not so much because we have great faith, but because we have no plan. Seek financial counsel and take tough steps to make your way back to a healthy balance sheet.  Proverbs 21:5

Check back tomorrow for three more energy drainers.

Chip is a professional counselor who has been counseling individuals, marriages, and families for almost twenty years. His driving desire in is to see people experience and enjoy real freedom and lasting change.  To learn more about Chip go to www.chipjudd.com or follow him on Twitter @chipjudd.

All Staff 03/09 – Boundaries, by Chip Judd from Seacoast Church on Vimeo.

EXPLORE

Watch: Chip Judd’s video discussion on boundaries in ministry.

Journal: Think through the following questions and write your answers in a journal and be prepared to discuss these with your mentor.

1. Write down two or three things that stood out to you the most from Chips teaching?
2. Where do you have the most difficult time setting healthy boundaries? Personal life, relationship, Work, Spiritual life.
3. Rate yourself on how easy or hard it is to say “no”. (1 – easy; 10 – hard) Explain your answer.
4. Are there things you’re allowing inside your “circle” that is not your responsibility?
5. Do you have any feelings of resentment toward anyone because you have allowed them to violate your boundaries?
6. What makes it so difficult to set healthy boundaries in ministry?

EXPERIENCE

Do the following activities to reinforce what you are learning about healthy boundaries.

Assess: In a journal write out a “Stop Doing” list.  Also look at your current job description and evaluate how well it matches what you are actually doing.  Write down adjustments you need to make.  Ask to meet and discuss this with your supervisor.

Practice:  Practice saying “NO”. Not for selfish reasons but for self–care and honesty. Monitor how easy, hard, successful or unsuccessful you are by keeping a journal of when you said “No”; how it felt when you said “No”; and what did you learn from saying “No”?

Plan:  Take 30 minutes to plan your week ahead of time. Decide ahead of time what you will say “Yes” to and what you will say “No” to. Use Microsoft Outlook or your daytimer to chart how you will spend your time this week.  Don’t forget to schedule family time.

EVALUATE

Meet with your mentor or team to discuss the following questions:

1. Where do you have the most difficult time setting healthy boundaries? Personal life, relationship? Work? Spiritual life? Your spiritual life? Your relationships? Your work life?
2. Rate yourself on how easy or hard it is to say “no”. (1 – easy; 10 – hard) Explain your answer.
3. What stood out to you the most from Chips teaching?
4. How did you do with the “Experiences” above? Was it helpful? What did you learn?
5. What are 3 or 4 principles that can help people establish healthy boundaries?

The message was titled:  Finding Freedom from Your Insecurities.  When fear and insecurity grip our life we create self-imposed boundaries that limit our freedom, joy, potential, dreams and possibilities.  And this inevitably produces painful regrets in our life. 

We typically blame past failures, rejection, abuse or unfair expectations for our insecurities.  While these are certainly contributing factors, they aren’t truly what’s at the root of a believers insecurities.  Understand, if these external factors are the things that determine our insecurities then we will never overcome our insecurities because we live in a world where we experience these things everday. So why do fear and insecurity get so deeply rooted our soul that they influence our attitudes and behaviors in such negative ways? As believers our insecurities ultimately are rooted in a lack of understanding our identity in Christ. In this message you’ll discover that Understanding your identity in Christ will free you from the insecurities that limit your possibilities.

To watch the message CLICK HERE, then click the white arrow in the black box that says Liberated.